Tuesday, November 28, 2006
In my search for all the horror stories I can find about gyms I came across this gem from Vanessa. She creatively describes going to the gym to one of Dante's circles of Hell.
Why Gyms Suck (a small diatribe for the those of us on the wrong side of the B.M.I)
1. Gyms Smell. I don't know why but every gym smells the same. Just like the dentist. You step into a gym and the aroma fills you with a sense of desperation and woe as you feel your upper lip curling in a derisive sneer at the glut of beautiful, shallow people. Until you catch a glimpse of your ass in the mirror in your those trackies and you slink off, head hanging low to face..
2.The Machines. What the hell are they for? Most people don't use the settings on them and apparently the recommended heart rates for cardio on them are all wrong. The gym guy told me to ignore them and just use the timer..I could use the pavement and my watch, it would be a lot cheaper..They're ugly and scary and boring as all hell!!
3. The Staff. there are two types of gym staff that I've enountered. the apathetic don't give a shit kind, who ignore you and wouldn't notice if you had a heart attack. And then there's the chipper, optimistic ones who make an effort to know your name so you won't quit. i don't mind these ones except they're usually the ones who give you advice on how to exercise. That's fine but they live in this world
click here for the rest. it's priceless. ¶ 6:57 AM
Why Gyms Suck (a small diatribe for the those of us on the wrong side of the B.M.I)
1. Gyms Smell. I don't know why but every gym smells the same. Just like the dentist. You step into a gym and the aroma fills you with a sense of desperation and woe as you feel your upper lip curling in a derisive sneer at the glut of beautiful, shallow people. Until you catch a glimpse of your ass in the mirror in your those trackies and you slink off, head hanging low to face..
2.The Machines. What the hell are they for? Most people don't use the settings on them and apparently the recommended heart rates for cardio on them are all wrong. The gym guy told me to ignore them and just use the timer..I could use the pavement and my watch, it would be a lot cheaper..They're ugly and scary and boring as all hell!!
3. The Staff. there are two types of gym staff that I've enountered. the apathetic don't give a shit kind, who ignore you and wouldn't notice if you had a heart attack. And then there's the chipper, optimistic ones who make an effort to know your name so you won't quit. i don't mind these ones except they're usually the ones who give you advice on how to exercise. That's fine but they live in this world
click here for the rest. it's priceless. ¶ 6:57 AM
